Saturday Randomness

Good Lord, it's May already. Is it just me or do the years keep going by more quickly? I thought last year flew by! Hell, that was nothing. By the time I know it, it'll be New Year's Eve again. How's that for some craziness?

So I'll be turning twenty-nine soon. I'm still undecided on how I feel about that. On one hand, I'm glad to see my twenties coming to a close. That chapter needs an ending. On the other, it's depressing to think I only have one more year left in my twenties. Let's hope thirty really is the new twenty...

Come to think of it, I think it just might be. The way my twenties went, I just might be able to actually enjoy things in my thirties. I like to think I've spent the last few years paying my dues. One can hope that now it's time to collect. Then again, every time I think that, something else comes along and backhands me. I've learned to keep my eyes open.

Did I ever mention I hate mowing the lawn? I would rather scrub a tub than mow the lawn. I can not stand it. I just mowed it last weekend, but thanks to all this rain we've been getting, it's right back where it was. The mower's all gassed up, waiting for me in the backyard. I just can't bring myself to get up and do it.

These are the times when I really need a personal assistant...

J

My Own Little Rut

I am unusually tired this afternoon, even for me. People ask me all the time, "Why are you so tired?" And, you know, I really can't come up with a reasonable answer. My job entails typing eight hours a day. Granted, looking at a computer screen all day does wear out my eyes, but come one, it's not exactly grueling work. I sleep at least seven hours a night (mostly out of consideration for my co-workers; they would not want to deal with me on any less sleep). My after-work routine consists of moving from one sitting position to another. Damn, I sound like a sloth.

Anyhow, by late afternoon, I am beat. I'm ready to get into bed, pop in Sex and the City, and call it a night. My sister says I sound like I'm 50. I think more around 60...

Is this what people call a rut? It sure sounds like it. Oh well. If everything goes according to plan, there are huge changes coming. Then I'll be crying for the boring days again...

J

Still Planning...

I have gotten to the point where I know without a doubt (well, nearly without a doubt) that I have to get out of Austin. I still can't explain why. I have this impending sense that there is something waiting for me that I will never catch if I stay here.

I've made a not-yet-concrete plan to make my way to New York by early September. The longer I stay in Austin, the harder it will be for me to leave. I have to go before it sucks me in again. As it is, it'll be hard as hell to leave come September.

I'm over 2/3 of where I want to be savings-wise. By the time I leave, I should have a decent cushion behind me, which is comforting because I'm terrified of ending up on the streets. I'm doing this on my own. There will be no immediate network of family and friends to call on. I have a few friends in New York, but none that are anywhere near as close as my people at home.

There are moments when I doubt myself and think I'm insane for thinking about such a big move. I'm sure as the big date approaches, those moments will become more frequent. Let's hope I can maintain the gumption to stick to the plan...

J